Ningo Traditions

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Traditions and Customs of the Ningo
Marriage Ceremonies:

Due to the hostile environment the Ningo live in, ceremonies are brief and serious affairs. Marriages among the Ningo, whether noble, royal, or commoner are all the same. An individual or the head of a family can request a marriage between the two parties. For nobility and royalty, all marriages are arranged by the head of the two Families involved, though individual members of said Families may request a match with a member of another Family for any reason. It is the choice of the heads of the respective Families to determine which individuals within their families are allowed to marry. For commoners, it is no different though individuals can marry without the permission of the head of their respective families. The Ningo do not have noble houses, per se, instead they refer to them as Families. As a result in legal and official matters, nobles are referred to by their title first, given name second, then "of Family" followed by their family name. Commoners are simply referred to either by their given name followed by their family name, or sometimes by their title if they have one, followed by their given name then surname.

With nobility and royalty, potential couples meet with the eldest female and the eldest male of the family. When multiple spouses exist, the primary spouse will also judge along with the other members of the family, though this is not only a judgement of worthiness but also how likely the candidate will get along with the other spouses already present. These individuals will then question and examine the prospective partner to determine if they are worthy of being tied to their family by marriage. Once married both parties keep the family name of their birth, however, their children shall bear the name of the dominant family of the relationship. The family that requests the marriage is considered the submissive family, the other being the dominant. Multiple marriages are allowed for both Ningo men and women, in fact both members of a given couple can have multiple spouses. This is a result of practicality to increase the numbers of offspring that can be produced, also to further benefit political marriages.
Multiple spouses is uncommon, however, as one must be able to provide for all spouses and children they have, or marry someone who is also able to provide for their children. Homosexuality isn't given much attention, though homosexual individuals, whether commoner or noble, are still expected to produce at least one child; as long as said child survives, they may do as they wish otherwise.

Once a marriage is agreed upon the couple come together as soon as the arrangements can be made. A priest or priestess of the Old Gods first addresses all present, asking that any who feel they would prove a better match for either the bride or groom to step forward and proclaim their challenge. If there is such a challenge, then challenger and challenged both make their case to prove they have the superior skill in matters of survival by verbal or physical means. The witnesses present stand as final judge of who is the victor in the dispute.
If there is no challenger, or when the victor of the challenge is decided, the couple kneel before the priest or priestess. The priest or priestess then places their hands on the heads of the couple and ask for the blessings of the Old Gods. Once complete the couple are told to rise and they are thereafter married.

Divorce:

Once married, if at any time either party of the couple wishes to no longer be married to their spouse, simply has to leave their spouse's home and return to the home of their family. They can inform their spouse of this or not, doing so with the intent of staying in their family's home and not returning to the home of their spouse is the beginning and end of the matter.
Any children born from the marriage will either go to live with one parent or spend time in the care of both depending on the agreements of the former couple. If an agreement cannot be reached, then the former couple shall bring the matter before the courts to render a decision.

Funeral Ceremonies:

When one dies, by Ningo tradition, the body is placed upon a pyre and cremated. The remains may then be prepared in a variety of ways based on the decision of the dead individual or their family. The individual's choice stands as superior to the judgement of their family. The remains may be spread across the land, scattered to the winds, thrown into the waters, or kept in a vessel by their family. Any other treatment of remains may be requested by the individual only, and such decisions must be provided in writing as proof.

Relationships:

Among commoners, it is common practice for a potential couple to spend time together to get to know one another before deciding whether they wish to marry or not. As marriages are arranged for nobility and royalty, in most cases, spending such time together typically takes place after an interest in a match is made. The Ningo recognize sexual desire as being a natural instinct and do not punish for it, even among nobility and royalty. Casual sex is not a taboo as long as all involved are consenting, there is little issue with it. Pre-marital sex is likewise not an issue as long as pregnancy doesn't result. The Ningo have become masters of the pull-out method, both male and female. For commoners it is encouraged, but not required, for the couple to refrain from any sexual activity until after the marriage itself. For the nobility and royalty, it is mandatory for no sexual activity to take place between the couple until after the marriage.
Public displays of affection are viewed negatively before a couple is married. Once married, it is viewed as a positive thing and will often bring smiles to the faces of others. That said, sexual activity in public is not permitted. These apply to both commoners and nobility. What is permitted, even for nobility and royalty, passionate kissing and lesser affectionate behavior is permitted as long as it's kept in private or around family members only. Groping and related behavior is not permitted even under these circumstances as it leads too easily to sexual behavior; though commoners will typically do so anyway, at least when young. Nobility and royalty do not permit such behavior at all, and being found doing so has been known to invalidate arranged marriages. It is also for these reasons the position of Guardian exists.

Guardians:

The position of Guardian serves a similar role to that of a handmaiden in Felaguria. Their role is to remain close to noble and royal individuals who have not been married. They are very knowledgeable in matters of Ningo traditions and culture and are to ensure that the activities of their charges fit within those limits. They will allow their charge to take part in actions that are acceptable, and prevent any action not acceptable. Their word can even override the orders of the charge's parents in such matters. Typically they are scholars, though anyone educated enough in Ningo cultures and traditions can potentially hold this position. Nobility rarely holds this position unless their charge is a close relative such as a niece or nephew. Due to how learned Guardians are, they hold a position in society of extremely high respect among nobility and commoner alike. The level of respect they are subject to is roughly the same as the respect and authority given the a Castellan in Felaguria. After the first marriage, the role of Guardian is considered no longer necessary so it is considered odd, though not negative, for one to still have a Guardian after this point.
For these reasons any Guardian who is personally guilty of allowing or even taking part in behavior that is not acceptable, whether with their charge or not, is not only stripped of position and status, but they often have their reproductive organs removed, and they are left in the wilderness naked, alone, and unarmed; often blindfolded as well. Such an extreme punishment reflects the seriousness of the position and helps to maintain the respect directed to those who hold the position.

Adultery and Multiple Spouses:

Having sex with someone other then your spouse after marriage is not encouraged but is technically allowed for much the same reason as it is prior to marriage. Typically, however, adultery does not take place. After marriage the focus is on producing as many children as possible due to the high child mortality rates the Ningo suffer. In the unlikely event bastards are produced, the child is treated the same as any other child in the family, though the parent responsible for the bastard will often be the subject of scorn or gossip. While not really a punishable offense; socially, word will spread and they will be the subject of much talk. The reason for the lack of punishment is the child is considered innocent as the parent was the one who didn't take proper precautions. This combined with the public ridicule and possible 'punishments' from the spouse are generally viewed as punishment enough. If not married then the parents punishments replace those of the spouse. The singular case of adultery where it is not treated negatively is when the lover is of the same gender as the one who is committing adultery. In such circumstances it is known the individual has unusual, though not negative, tastes sexually. As long as they are producing children only with their recognized spouse/spouses, and the lovers are not risking the reproductive health of either parent or the health of children, then there is no social punishment or stigma.

When it comes to the issue of multiple spouses and heredity, things can get complicated though the system is relatively simple. If all spouses have a submissive position to the single spouse, then the parent of which child doesn't matter as much. When the single spouse is male and the multiples are female it is similarly a non-issue as long as there is no adultery. Any child born will have the same father and so the child will take the name based on the relationship of the individual couple. The complicated part is when the single spouse is a woman and the multiples are male. In these events, the woman simply has to be careful and plan things out so she can be certain which husband fathered which child. Again this is only an issue if the mother is not the dominant in all the marriages. As to the marriages where she is dominant, the children will have her name; otherwise the child will have the father's name.

Patrician:

The title of Patrician is the only gender-neutral term the Ningo have, and refers to the equivalent of their king or queen. Though the title of Patrician will typically continue for at least a few generations, it is not actually a hereditary title. Instead the individual that best proves their ability to survive and influence others in Ningo culture holds the title. There have been ten dynasties of Patrician to date; the newest is the Third Cornelia Dynasty. This came about when the former Patrician of the Second Valeria Dynasty, Aegidius, proclaimed his son-in-law his heir, then after his death, and the two challenges for the position were settled making Agostino of Family Cornelia the current Patrician since the year 659.